Perhaps the greatest power—and danger—a huge fan of anything holds is her ability to be blinded by her adoration, losing all common sense, heaping compliments and rave reviews where none should go. And perhaps because I fear the real human potential to worship something beyond reason, I have a short list of things that have really withstood the test of time and will likely always blind me with delirious appreciation. I thought it would be wise to start my time at @Newsarama with a full disclosure of these biases. The shortness of this list does not mean I do not celebrate the genius of many, many, (perhaps too many?) things I have seen, or read, or experienced, but these and these alone blind my critical mind to the point of total idiocy and leave me immobilized with childlike wonder no matter how many times I’ve experienced them:

1) “X-Files” season 6 stand-alone episodes.
2) The running mindtrip of the 13^th floor in Louis Sachar’s “Wayside School” series that blew my mind in 3^rd grade.
3) “Werewolf Bat Mitzvah”
4) Corn-on-the-cob at summer fairs with that one spicy Cajun spicy salt on it
5) Alan Tudyk

I know full well not everyone will agree with me (corn?) but I just can’t help myself. I’m a HUGE fan. And while I know some feelings may fade with time, my worship of Mr. Tudyk (for you non-Polish-speaking people, that’s pronounced “Two-Dick”) has remained from the moment I almost wet myself watching him swing helplessly on a ropes course in that mostly awful Sandra Bullock movie, “28 Days.” I should stipulate, this is not a schoolgirl crush or creepy obsession. I am, quite simply, an unconditional fan. He could be in any medium and I will experience it and think it millions of times better just for him being in it. And I will gush about it, oh yes, I will gush.

Perhaps it goes without saying that his Hoban “Wash” Washburne in “Firefly” and “Serenity” was brilliant. This role brought me so much joy that I have since refused to refer to him by his first name, for fear that my distant lack of respect may somehow break the enchantment he has crafted with God or the Devil (or Mr. Whedon) that has enabled him to appear in pretty much everything cult since. Now on “V,” Mr. Tudyk continues the romp with his dark side that went into full swing when he played Alpha in “Dollhouse” (which was a terrifyingly and delightfully bumble bumble SLASH SLASH performance).

So I knew Mr. Tudyk was amazing, and I was just minding my own obsessive business checking how many “V” episodes he will appear in online (I dare not say so as to not spoil the fun), when it dawned on me that this man-god does not live on SF and Whedon alone. In fact, I believe Mr. Tudyk has managed to wield the power of comedic timing and exceptional character acting unlike any before him and transcended into so many cult niches that it boggles the mind. Fans of virtually every cult genre of entertainment probably secretly adore Mr. Tudyk without realizing what else he’s done. He might very well be the Kevin Bacon of all things cult. Or perhaps just the warm, fuzzy Venn-Diagram center.

No matter what cult thing you enjoy, there’s a Mr. Tudyk for you:

British Comedies: see “Death at Funeral” (2007) (with an added bonus role in the “Spamalot” musical).  “Death at a Funeral” is your classic dark British comedy, featuring 1) a solid introduction of several opposing, involved characters, 2) those characters coming together to do something serious, 3) having it all descend into a comedy of exponential errors, 4) awkwardness, 5) priests. As the convincingly pale, British, tight-wound Simon, Mr. Tudyk roughly steals the show as a man on ecstasy at a funeral. His buttocks are also convincingly pale and British and appear whilst he is on a roof.

Anachronism: See “A Knight’s Tale” (2001).  As Wat, Mr. Tudyk leaves the nudity to Paul Bettany and dons ye olde fake talk exceptionally well.
(Note: after watching these two films, you will be convinced Mr. Tudyk is British, but actually, he’s from Texas.)

Vaughn/Stiller Vehicles and/or Pirates: See “Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story” (2004). As Steve the Pirate, Mr. Tudyk satisfies both.

Full Apatow: See “Knocked Up” (2007). As the scummy entertainment exec, Mr. Tudyk uses hand gestures well.

People who like Will Smith movies and haven’t read Asimov: See “I, Robot” (2004).  Mr. Tudyk makes like Andy Serkis (”Gollum”) and becomes Sonny the self-aware robot.

All-Good-Fox-Shows-Get-Canceled Theories: See “Arrested Development” episode Season 2, Episode 6 “Meat the Veals” (2005). As Pastor Veal, Mr. Tudyk is the shadow self of Micheal Bluth and father to the endearingly forgettable Egg (Ann).

Sandra Bullock: See “28 Days” (2000). As Gerhardt, Mr. Tudyk cannot have sex until he can keep a plant alive.

(Note: After seeing this film, you will be convinced that Mr. Tudyk is gay and German. He would like his fans to know that he is neither. For more information, see his unofficial fansites: alantudyk.net, where I found the pics, and alantudyk.org.)

I thought it ended there.  But no.  You don’t even have to be a hardcore fan of any genre. Apparently, you just have to breathe to appreciate Mr. Tudyk.

Kids: See “Ice Age” (2006). He is the voice of Cholly. He is flatulent.

Gamers: Play “Halo 3” (2007) and “Halo 3: ODST” (2009). Like many other “Firefly” alums, his voice work is all over the Marines and later, Mickey.

Old People: see “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation” Season 7, Episode 6 “Burn Out” (2005). As Carl the pedophile, Mr. Tudyk has his first brush with being evil.

Dads: see “3:10 to Yuma” (2007). He’s Doc Potter in this non-space Western. This is actually a great remake, also starring another undersung hero, Ben Foster.

So, I feel a little better. My unabashed fan love of Mr. Tudyk is likely shared with everyone in the known universe. Show me a person who does not appreciate Mr. Tudyk once they find out who he is, and I will try to cut a little V behind their ears to show you they are reptilian aliens. He is the pop rock of cult, adding the addictive fizzle to everything in which he appears, and I wish him many, many roles to come.

And you, @Rama readers, do you love Mr. Tudyk like I do? Is there anything that a little Mr. Tudyk couldn’t make better?

This entry was posted on Saturday, November 7th, 2009 at 5:27 pm and is filed under Fandom. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.