The Onion’s A.V. Club rattles off its list of 18 fictional drugs, and uncovers Ralph Dibny’s stash:
Most drugs in superhero comics are addictive and destructive. (Even the Golden Age hero Hourman eventually got hooked on his own power pill, Miraclo.) Leave it to the basically benign super-sleuth The Elongated Man to get his stretching abilities from a mild nutritional supplement, enhanced by chemistry. Having discovered that carnival contortionists all drink a soda flavored with the hard-to-find Gingo fruit, free-spirited intellectual Ralph Dibny concocts his own extra-intense version of the drink, which interacts with his latent metahuman genes and gives him the power to, well, elongate. Alongside his jet-setting wife Sue, Dibny travels the world, swilling Gingold soda and solving crimes, usually by stretching his ear really far to overhear the crooks’ plans. Then his wife gets raped and murdered—but that isn’t the Gingold’s fault.
Marvel’s Mutant Growth Hormone also makes the list, alongside the likes of Melange from Dune, Synthehol from Star Trek, and SPANK from Grand Theft Auto III.
April 1st, 2008 at 9:49 am
STARK Trek?
Does that mean syntheol turned Tony into such a prick? Damn, the guy can’t even hold *fake* alcohol!
I know, I know I make tons of typos when I post. Still, you might wanna fix that.
Anyhow, the Onion article should’ve included Romulan ale. I want to know what’s in that stuff that makes it illegal in the Federation.
April 1st, 2008 at 9:58 am
No Velocity 9? That’s sort of disappointing.
April 1st, 2008 at 1:56 pm
“No _____? How dare they??”
(Key 23 would have been my choice.)
April 2nd, 2008 at 2:32 pm
Heh.
Definitely not a “How DARE they!” I was just surprised. Velocity 9 has a really long history and continues to be relevant.
But getting outraged about an exclusion on a list of 18 fake drugs? I really don’t want to be That Guy.